Sunday, January 15, 2012
Battlezone: Spider-Man vs. Batman
A blog is a special place, it's your own site. You can do whatever you want with it, even turn it into a journal. I thought it was time to start playing with it, start adding some new categories. The retro review was a great start, but now it was time to start something else. So I devised something other sites and blogs have already done: fights. Battlezone will be pitting two characters against each in a fan fic written by your's truly, followed by a short editorial on why I picked who to win. And I take requests for who to fight. So without further ado, onto the first fight in BATTLEZONE! I'll kick it off with a classic comic book fight, pitting a Marvel hero against a DC hero.
Spider-Man vs. Batman
THE PLACE: Gotham City. It was night, then again, stories usually take place at night there. An unfamiliar figure is slinging his way through the city. Spider-Man surveyed the area, he thought it looked similar to New York, except 'darker.' He had already stopped a mugging, he knew that this city was even worse than New York in terms of crime rate. He swung until he saw it in the sky.
Ahead he could see a car unlike no other coming his way. Spider-Man jumped to the ground. The vehicle parked a few feet to the of him. The right door opened. The Dark Knight detective, Batman, stepped out. Spidey had heard legends of the Dark Knight, but they were too modest, he was truly an imposing figure. Batman walked toward Spider-Man until they were standing face to face. Spidey had his arms crossed while Batman stood as still as a statue. Spidey was the first to speak.
"Wow Bats, the stories I've heard of you don't even begin to flatter. Is that a genuine cape?"
"Spider-Man. Let's get this over with."
Batman laid a punch. Spidey's great reflexes managed him to evade. He jumped on top of a flagpole and shot a strand of web. It struck Batman. He cut it with a batarang and threw it at Spidey. He jumped from the flagpole as the batarang struck the building behind it. The explosion sent Spidey off course and then smacked against the ground. He regained his senses quickly, but by then Batman had come. He kicked Spidey then got him into a headlock. Prior to this meeting, Batman had studied Spidey extensively at the Batcave. He knew all his tricks. Spidey of course was twice as strong as a regular human. He broke free and threw Batman. He banged a flag pole. Spidey shot web. It tied Batman to said flag pole. Spidey approached and did his signature crouching pose.
"Well Bats, I think I win by default. You won't be going anywhere for at least an hour. Since I'm visiting, I just wanted to say that this place could really use more street lamps, almost got lost a few times slinging."
What Spidey had not realized was that while he was talking, Batman was slowly cutting the webs. Spidey looked up at the Bat-Signal.
"They really need to make me one of those."
With his attention to the sky, Batman broke free of the webs. Spidey quickly looked to see a Batarang about to strike his mask.
"Reminds me of the Goblin's toys." He thought as he ducked.
It exploded when it struck the building behind him. Batman stood, awaiting Spidey 's next move. Spidey spoke.
"Wow, the stories are not even close to being fully descriptive, I didn't think you'd break my webbing so fast. Now there's a Batman."
Batman threw two more batarangs. Spider-Man dodged every single one and tackled Batman to the ground. They were wrestling until Batman managed to throw Spidey. He banged against the Batmobile. Batman was getting tired of this, it was being dragged out too long he thought.
He took out a batarang and threw it to the ground. Smoke appeared, covering the area in which they were fighting. Batman preferred to fight like this, in the shadows. He owned the night. What he had forgotten, however, was Spidey's Spider-Sense. He could see Spidey searching for him in the smoke. He then ran in for the knockout. Spider-Man sensed it, turned around, grabbed the punch, then gave the finishing blow. Batman went flying out of the smoke. Spider-Man jumped out. Batman lay on the floor, unconscious. Spidey had won, but was exhausted. He looked up the Bat-Signal once more, then slang away.
Yes, I went with Spidey on this. I love this match-up becuase I'm surprised at how diverse who people think could win. Like, at youth group a few weeks ago, I asked two people this, "Alright guys, poll question. Spider-Man or Batman?" That got them thinking, then I said "Not who's cooler, who would win." Then they were like "ohhhh" and went with Batman. I don't fully understand why so many people consider Batman to be so powerful. Let's look at this match realistically. Spider-Man is twice as strong, twice as fast, and twice as agile. He handles people like Venom on a regular basis while Batman handles people like Two Face. So I give this match to Spidey. And no, I am not an anti-Batman fan. On the contrary, he is my favorite DC character, I just like things to be accurate.
NEXT WEEK: A certain red-hatted plumber battles a certain blue hedgehog.